January 2016

January is a tough month. The excitement of the holidays are over and the realization that it is dark by dinner and we are firmly in winter for the next few months can hit hard. We are living in a rental house until March so while packing and wiping the endless runny noses we are getting creative in a small space with most of our belongings packed! Matthew is quickly becoming a foodie! He gobbles up his meals as quickly as the other kids and bangs his fists and screeches for more...we are working on table manners:) Elizabeth is ever the little mother...she came with me to the hardware store with her list of scribbles and her "lady purse". The boys had an idea to make a giant slide with their mattresses down the stairs and after a brief weighing of the risk of breaking a bone versus the risk of their mother losing her mind after the 2nd straight week stuck at home with another sick child...they won.

Happy Birthday Matthew!

My baby is one! This year was a roller coaster of events and you took it all in, grinning all the while. You just fit right in, grinning and smiling and reaching for your loved ones. Quietly taking in new skills and mastering them with a little smirk that says "look what I can do!". You are mischievous and funny...that sense of humor; willingness to giggle, snicker and belly laugh for anything at all and the delight it brings you to be the cause of laughter is a defining trait I think. There is much to still learn about you I think, I love getting to know you deeper as more of yourself emerges.

Matthew Thomas.

Matthew means Gift from God. And that you are. We did not believe we could have more children, until of course you were here.

And Thomas.

For the doubting Thomas of biblical times who reminds us that God is in control. That the impossible can be possible and there is always a place for hopeful petition ...because you were always hoped for.

I never told your dad of course. I didn't want him to believe that I was upset at our likely inability to have more children. I didn't want him to know of the lingering feeling that someone was missing. How I accidently bought four matching Christmas stockings for our three children or routinely put out 4 plates for their lunch... Until one day I heard a wistful comment that confirmed he felt the same. A longing, a wish...a hope. And then we hoped together and quietly for...you.

And if there was ever a baby so happy and beautiful and beloved and wanted, you delivered. You are such a sweet joy in our lives. A true gift and a blessing every moment we have known you.

Sometimes I look at you in disbelief that you are everything I could have dreamt of and more. I am in disbelief at times that I questioned fleetingly if I could be enough for four. Would my patience, energy, insight...love...be enough? Could I be stretched to cover the needs of another? And then so perfectly, as soon as I saw you; just as my body knew just how you needed to grow, instinctively this area of my heart expanded so that before I even knew it existed ...it was full. The part that was yours all along.

I adore you, I cherish you, I am grateful for you; my beautiful boy.

Happy birthday Matthew.

I love you so very much,
Mommy xoxo

11 Months Old!

Matthew is a Mama's boy. He needs to be within eyesight or arms reach pretty much all the time. He will visit with others briefly but he is pretty eager to get back to his Mama...which I can't say I mind. It makes getting dinner ready a little challenging but I will pick his cuddles anyday! Matthew is a sweetheart; an affectionate, cuddly, snuggly sweetheart! When he wakes up in the morning he is heard practicing his enthusiastic "HI-YA's" and when I open the door he is already flapping his arm in his mastered wave and needs to make the rounds. Each face is greeted with the same grin and "HI-YA!". He certainly follows his siblings in appetite! He breaks into a giggle if he sees a banana and watermelon? -you just made his day! So far the only thing he really doesn't care for is anything with potato in it.  He loves veggies- cucumbers, carrots, broccoli, cauliflower, those are the first things off his plate! We just love this boy so much! He is such a precious delightful boy! I cannot believe he is almost a year old. In some ways I feel like he was just born and in others I cannot imagine a time when he wasn't here!

10 Months Old

Matthew Thomas! You are getting too big! You have lots of teeth, an infectious giggle, soft hair that is turning lighter and lighter by the day and big blue eyes. I love getting you up in the morning when you are jumping, laughing, babbling and clapping in excitement to start the day. You are such a good humored little guy. Everything makes you laugh and you adore your brothers and sister. You love Twinkle Twinkle little Star, You are My Sunshine and peek a boo. You love to be chased, have no interest in walking and seem to be moving out of (thankfully) your biting phase.

9 Months old!

9 months on the outside!

This busy, happy boy has 4 teeth, and LOVES to eat. his favorites are avocado, steamed baby carrots, lasagna, sunbutter on toast and apple sauce. The only thing so far he has refused to eat is potatoes. Strange but true (who doesn't like potatoes!).

Matthew is finally sleeping through the night...he went from waking multiple times a night to sleeping 13 hours straight! He sleeps from about 6:45-7:45. He isn't napping in the morning anymore as a result but has a 2 hour nap in the afternoon.

Matthew is learning to do "tricks" which he loves as there is always a reaction from his faithful cheerleading squad. He gives high fives, waves and claps and scrunches up his face in a big grin because he knows he is clever and adorable:)

He is crawling very fast and standing for a few moments on his own but shows no interest really in walking yet which is just fine with me!

He is a cuddly baby, loves to snuggle with mom and tolerates Ella holding him occasionally but generally squirms away to her disappointment. she would hold him all day if he would only let her!

We love you Mattie! You are such a fun, smart and adorable baby!

Boys!

It took 8 years and three boys to finally embrace the noise, the boogers, the animal noises (we have no actual pets...) the climbing, the jumping the endless wrestling and tackling, the desire to sleep under the bed rather than on it and all the things that being a mom of boys entails. But these are the stereotypes, what I expected. What no one told me was how fiercely little boys love their moms. How they love to cuddle and hold hands and how their pockets hold dead spiders and flowers for you. They don't tell you about how they are so gentle to a baby kitten their hand trembles as they try to hold back their rough nature and how considerate and kind and generous they are. They don't tell you how when your little two year old is knees high in mud in his rubber boots with scrapped knees and a dinky car in one hand and a stone that was worth the mission in another that you might melt into that mud puddle you love him so much.

8 Months old!

Mr. Matthew. What a ham you are...both in your belly laughs, your silly sense of humor and the arm rolls and belly you sport and I adore.

You are always ready with a grin. You are most content in someone's arms or strapped in your cozy snowsuit in the stroller watching the kids play outside. You are crawling everywhere and standing for a few seconds at a time without support, thankfully you have no real interest in walking yet. We had two early walkers in our family and I would be just fine with you waiting for awhile:)

You are so curious! I know most babies your age are interested in new things but your intense focus and determination to get at something new is unique. You love baseball caps and remote controls and show zero interest in any of your toys. You like splashing in the bath (or toilet...whatever you can get to first) and will eat anything and everything. You like to have a full sensory eating experience which means you like to feel it, smell it, lick it , smear it on your face and throw it!

You have one 30-40 minute nap in the morning around 9 o clock. You nap again from 1-3pm and go to bed at 7. You like to wake up at 5:30-6:00 and it would be fine with me if you wanted to start your day just a littttttle later:)

You are an adaptable little fellow and like to be in new places. You are getting to be a little bit shy and prefer to be with Mommy over anyone else when we are out...a phase I enjoy very much:)

You sister adores you. She sings songs about her "Baby Mattie" that go like this...
"I loooooove my baby brudder Mattie- He is so so so cute! - I will not hit or pinch him, or kick or scratch him because he would cryyyyyyyy. I would get sent to my room and have my door locked and then I would cry toooooo".
She is gifted.

Ben and Jake think you are the best. They love when you do something new. Every noise they swear is a new word and they think you are so smart. Every new milestone is cause for celebration. You are such a loved baby.

Jacob tells me often- "Mattie is JUST the baby we wanted!"

He is so right!

 ***Watching jeopardy before bed- you love this show! It is the craziest thing- whenever you hear the music you want up to watch it!

 First swing on a mild morning! You LOVED it!

Empting drawers is your favorite thing to do:)