One year ago I was in a shocked fog. The week of your second year on earth was met with a tremendous amount of heartache and fear. The reality of what the coming year held for our family was so much to think about. Too much. Your Daddy had been diagnosed with Cancer just a week before and the news was still settling.
Today I am happy to say we are in a much different place. Your Daddy gave it his all. He is in fact exactly as much of a superhero as you give him credit for. He is amazing.
Your second year was a full one, to be sure. One I am glad in some ways you won't remember much of. But we will remember you. As you were, right now. And what you meant to us.
You were born three years ago in the early morning on the most beautiful January day. I can remember every detail of your birth. You came quickly and easily into the world. An expression of the boy you would become. I remember coming home with you before breakfast to a sun that was just rising and putting you in a shaft of light pouring in the window. You looked like a little blond angel. You had my heart...right there in that moment and every moment since.
There is so much to love about you;
Your wispy curls, your mischievous eyes the color of the sky on the clearest day. Your big hands that remind us of a St. Bernard puppy when you try something new. You are fearless and energetic and bright. You have an impossible amount of empathy. You love genuinely and care about people around you very much. You love animals and babies and your gentle and nurturing way with them is a sweet paradox to the headstrong and rough manner that you usually carry yourself in.
You love to cuddle when you decide to take a break from your monster hunting, wrestling and dragon fighting. And I love to be the welcoming lap. You have no idea how big you are getting. You don't realize that I have to brace myself when I pick you up or have to shift to fit your body curled up on my lap like you insist on. I love the weight of you in my arms and how you relax so completely in them.
When life is hard, impossible even. When hearts are aching and tears are plenty. A two year old is the very best thing in the whole wide world. Such a gift you are to us. In our lives and in our family. you are the distraction from hardship that got us through some dark moments. You and your innocence had the capability like no one else to pull us back into the moment. Not into the fear of the future but into the "right now". The only time to a little boy.
Your "right now'" included a lot of "ya-hoo's" dancing, playdough pies, treasure hunts in the bushes, hide and seek, flooded bathrooms, laundry piles to leap into, games of tackle and toast (you REALLY love toast!) bottles of milk, one more push on the swing and learning to use your scooter. You reminded us of the thrill of the climb up a slide and big mud puddle at the bottom. The joy of a popsicle and trip to the toy store. You helped us laugh with your singing, your dancing and your enthiasm for...everything.
You love life Jacob.
You eat it up and spit back out in a way that lights up the world around you. You glow with joy and zest and charm. You are a beautiful, beautiful child.
We adore you and we are grateful for you. For bringing a light to our lives when we needed it most in your perfectly two year old self.
Happy Birthday my darling boy.
I love every inch of you and every moment of being your Mother.
Mommy
xoxoxo
No comments:
Post a Comment